On December 12, 2023, The Office of Environmental Health and Safety (or, as I like to call them, The Office of Soulless Stinky Little Party Poopers) tore me away from my one true love – my partner through thick and thin: my GoTrax G5 scooter.  In the blink of an eye, I had to say […]

Bill Clinton (SFS ‘68) is a world renowned statesman, diplomat, perjurer, philanthropist, adulterer, and most importantly, Georgetown alumnus. As a true Renaissance man, he is constantly seeking to expand his boundaries, and the final frontier, he’s decided, is eating cockroaches regularly! As he gazed at his own off-putting face he explained, “Roaches everywhere like we […]

Ok, here it is! The Hoya application link. You can click it if you want. It’s just a Google Form, this should be easy! Get to muckraking! Threaten to sue people! Read the paper! https://forms.gle/yKNQhk2hZbk9hqdH8

On Wednesday, April 6th, 2022, Dr. Ranit Mishori decided she could take it no longer. Looking out of her penthouse on the top floor of MedStar Georgetown University Hospital, Mishori peered out over the teeming masses of students and cried, “Look at their horrible teeth! Rooting bones in rotting flesh!” Mishori threw her stethoscope to […]

8. “Honey, please stop looking at me like that.” That tricky little gecko wasn’t going to give in easily. I knew that I would have to be persistent if I was to unmask him. I was just positive that he was inside a giant costume that looked remarkably like my wife. 7. “No, I can’t […]

Professor-Pondeaux-Poirot began the first-day-of-class with a mis-leading lecture about the importance of feeding your brain, saying snacks are always-welcome in Psychology-101. I took this with guidance with open-arms and an un-matched eager-ness as I am a often-hungry-individual. Flash-forward to mid-terms and I missed lunch-time because I got dis-tracted working-out at Yates, and I did-not have […]

Sophomore Bernard Manilow (COL ‘23), is majoring in Portuguese and Spanish with a Creative Writing minor, and yet he still manages to find time in between his short stories and foreign films to go hang out with your mom. When asked about how he juggles all these responsibilities, Bernard explained, “There is a strong sense […]

RIDGEMONT ELEMENTARY –Grammar lessons took an unexpected turn today in Mrs. Eduard’s second grade class. Students returned from recess prepared for one of their standard sessions about the parts of speech but instead got something much more exciting. They learned how some words are not confined to just one categorization. “This was really an eye […]