Following a long and heated debate regarding the cultural theme of Georgetown University’s newest academic building, university administrators announced Friday that the recently completed Intra-Cultural Center will specifically focus on Serbian culture and accomplishments.
Sorting through hundreds of potential cultures over the course of seven months, university officials and students finally came to an agreement late Wednesday night.
“We already did all that lovey-dovey ‘all cultures are good’ equality crap with that Inter-Cultural Center, but now it’s time to get real and commemorate the single best culture ever: the Serbs,” said Todd Olson, Vice President for Student Affairs and Dean of Students. “We considered Shona culture, Khmer Krom culture, even Iranian Pashtoon culture. Ultimately, though, it was never even a real competition; the Serbs had this in the bag from day one.”
President DeGioia spoke of the announcement on Friday evening to a small group of students and university officials.
“Serbs! Serbs! Serbs! Serbs! Serbs! Aw man, I can see it now. Performances of Kolo in the lobby, paintings by Uroš Predić and Vladimir Veličković on the walls, maybe the Corp can set up little food stand specializing in čevapčiči. And the whole building’s going to run on AC current. I’m just so excited.”
Despite the celebrations surrounding the announcement, not everyone is satisfied with the decision.
“Whatever,” said Milot Kastrati (SFS ’15), student and president of the Yugoslavian Reunification Club. “Just… whatever.”
Kastrati added that his organization supports a moratorium on Intra-Cultural Center construction and would instead like to see the construction of an extensive web-like Serb-focused skyway linking together the Albanian, Bulgarian, Croat, Hungarian, Macedonian, Montenegrin, Muslim, Slovak, and Slovene-themed buildings on campus.