TUCSON, AZ – Jared Callahan, a man who has never worked a day in his life and who does not speak a word of English, is being completely supported by a pair of hard-working Americans. Chad Callahan, a software engineer, and his wife Laura Callahan, a schoolteacher, are expected to provide and care for his every need.

Jared, who entered the United States only a week ago, has already taken full advantage of the American welfare system. Each time Chad and Laura collect their paychecks, a large sum of their hard-earned money is immediately going to shelter, feed, and provide other necessities for the freeloader.

David Lewis, an economist at the University of Chicago provided insight into the experience which seems to be a growing problem in the U.S. and abroad, “This is a textbook free rider-problem. This guy [Jared] has clearly figured out how it all works. But in all fairness, our welfare state is so unregulated even a child could figure out how to game the system.”

Liberal commentators have come out in force supporting Jared’s exploitation of Mr. and Mrs. Callahan. These voices claim that Jared has not had the same opportunities that others have. They predict that given time, Jared will learn English and other skills, like standing and eventually walking, necessary to hold a job for himself.

However, these commentators fail to ask the all-important question: who do they expect to pay for Jared’s education? Reports have indicated that Laura Callahan has already missed multiple months of work trying to provide for this new resident of America, and she will most likely miss more time.

The system seems unlikely to punish Jared and others like him who have recently arrived to America. Dr. Lewis’ continued, “If we embrace free-riders with this sort of loving compassion, there’s no future for America. We need a system that makes people like Jared work for their livelihood, not have others work for him.”

At press time, sources reported that the couple has clearly fallen victim of liberal indoctrination, as they have embraced the lazy good-for-nothing like a son.