It’s that time of the year again.

Everyone across the nation is lacing up their sneakers, adjusting their hats, slipping into their lucky Bart Simpson socks. These moments are cherished; but no one ever thinks twice about their ritual. That is why this year we at the Heckler don’t just call, but beg, for the nation to boycott Red Lobster and their Seaside Shrimp Trio.

It might be the crowd-pleaser that won over your wife, or the delicious, savory seafood delight you had the first night you got drunk, but Red Lobster is not to be trusted. Red Lobster has shown a commitment to no do-goodery and the Heckler refuses to stand idly by as America’s favorite Super Bowl Snack smears the name of the good men on the field. Its time to wake up, rise up, and resist Red Lobster.