The Georgetown Heckler

News | March 3, 2017

Trump Takes a Chance on State Dept. Intern – Now He’s the Assistant Secretary!

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FOGGY BOTTOM – The administration of Donald Trump announced Tuesday morning that Marcus Dewalt (SFS ’19), an intern at the State Departments’ Bureau of Administration, had been promoted to Assistant Secretary of State for Public Affairs. “We expect great things of Mr. Dewalt, who has already shown his promise by re-organizing the Bureau’s paper stocks,” said Sean Spicer, White House Press Secretary.

The large numbers of vacancies that have recently opened up in the State Department have put up and comers like Dewalt on the track for rapid promotion.

In his new role, Dewalt will be responsible for all of the United States’ public relations outreach to foreign populations from the 294 embassies, consulates, and diplomatic missions around the world. He said he planned on using primarily social media.

“Just friend me – I post a lot of good articles,” he informed the 13,000 Foreign Service Officers.

“I’m so happy that I can finally realize my potential and take on a new role after learning the basics here,” said a grateful Dewalt, who began his internship two weeks ago. “I knew I would be taking on a lot more responsibility, but to be honest just handling the office coffee pot and lunch orders was a lot in itself.”

The Georgetown sophomore was excited to apply his coursework in International Relations to real-life diplomacy. “Just this morning I explained to Secretary Tillerson what NATO is – he seemed really intrigued by it,” said Dewalt.

Despite Dewalt’s enthusiasm, many posts remain empty. The Trump Administration said it would be broadening its efforts to find suitable candidates, including seeking qualified individuals from the diplomatic corps of Russia.

At press time, Dewalt was running late for a meeting with the Korean Ambassador after missing his alarm following a ‘Beerlympics’ competition in his Copley room the previous evening.