Archive for November, 2003

Student Hides Roommate’s Medication for Class Project

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

In the regrettable conclusion to a failed class project last week, one Georgetown student is left in critical condition after missing his medication for three days. The student’s roommate, who will remain anonymous pending criminal investigation, was taking one of the coveted speech pattern classes with acclaimed Deborah Tannen. A class assignment required students... »

Take Back the Night Counter Protest: The Day Is Still Ours

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

Take Back the Night Week ended in Red Square this past Friday with a rally. The event, culminating a week’s effort to create awareness about gender violence, was hugely successful. 250 members of the Georgetown community, mostly female, gathered to show support for the cause, asserting that by banding together females need... »

Witch Burned at the Stake in Red Square

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003
Witch Burned at the Stake in Red Square

On the evening of October 31, Halloween night, Justine Nichols (COL ’05), disguised as a witch, was burned at the stake in Red Square. Several Hoyas were struck with horror when they saw Nichols parading around campus in a costume that revealed virtually none of her naked body. Says Arthur Miller (SFS... »

More Headlines

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

Women’s Basketball Conference Officials Approve New, Hipper Name: The Big Yeast Eco-Action Club to Begin Condom Recycling Program Area Residents “Get A Kick Out Of” Letting Dogs Crap on Healy Lawn Sugar’s Keepin’ it in the Family: Ma and Pa Sugar Hire their Fourth Daughter to Join her Sisters in Manning the Grill at Georgetown’s Most Happening... »

New Reality Show Has Audiences in Stitches

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

The fall TV season is in full swing, and it wouldn’t be the same with out a new reality TV show. Almost every network has released a series that flaunts sex or disgusting acts of humiliation for cash, but the Christian Broadcasting Network (CBN) is the only one that dared to be different. Building... »

‘F’ Grade Takes On New Meaning

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

Joseph McCormick (SFS ’06) stunned his fellow International Relations classmates on Tuesday, when he received an ‘F’ on his midterm. Although McCormick had declared, “Holy shit, I totally failed that,” on the day of the test, no one really believed him. At Georgetown, phrases like “Oh my God I did so bad... »

Georgetown Launches Pre-Emptive Strike Against George Washington University Over NCAA Objections

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

In the most recent case of the haves screwing the have-nots, Georgetown University has set a dreadful precedent for colleges and universities across the nation by launching a pre-emptive battle to overthrow the current administration of nearby George Washington University. Blatantly ignoring objections from a vocal group of university and college student from all... »

UIS Technician’s Pornographic Fantasy Finally Comes True

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

Georgetown University Information Services technician Steve Walters finally realized his dream of sexual relations on the job Monday. The assignment began just like any other Walters explained, “It was just a routine house call to re-establish LAN connection for a girl living in Henle. It was routine until she answered the door wearing only... »

OP-ED: Veteran’s Day: Reflections of an American Patriot

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

As Veteran’s Day approached a flood of warm and vivid memories descended upon me like the leaves of an autumn tree. Many thoughts floated around in my head but mostly I thought about the countless days sitting on my grandfather’s front porch and listening to stories about him and his friends back when... »