Disgruntled Students Secede from Hoya Blue; Form Saxa Gray
Fed up with the governance of the school sports fan base Hoya Blue, a large group of students led by Billy Bob Jackson (COL ’06) announced their separation yesterday from the mainstream union of fans. Says Jackson, “We’ve gone and decided that the Hoya Blue board done grown too large and powerful for our likin’.” Jackson and Saxa Gray cited the omnipresence of Hoya Blue at university-related sporting events as overbearing and troubling, and they claim that the executive board tries to strong-arm fans into wearing the navy ‘I Bleed Hoya Blue’shirts, painting their faces, and joining in chants. “The executive board has no authority to control the people. They have no place in the stands at games I done paid my ticket for!” said Billy Bob Jackson in an interview on his front porch. When asked if the separation was discussed with the Hoya Blue board, vice-chair of the new organization Charles “Corky” Lee (COL ’07) jumped from his rocking chair and exclaimed, “We don’t give a rats ass what the elite has to say about it. We the people have spoken, and we have a right to govern ourselves. Pistols at dawn to anyone with the gumption to try and stop us!” When I pointed out that many tickets are actually free to students, they chased me off their land with a shotgun.
When asked about the separation, Hoya Blue president Steven Grant (MSB’05) claims that not only does it violate the group constitution filed with the university, but it also allows the Georgetown sports program to suffer. “Having such a loose confederation of students with little organization or governance will defeat the purpose of even having a fan group. Hoya Blue is supposed to have a wicked awesome presence at the events. Why else do we all wear the blue shirts and have a minimum blood-alcohol content of .30 at every game? We gotta tell our teams and other fans WE’RE HERE! Will Saxa Gray have that much of a presence at each game? I don’t see them road tripping to ‘Cuse’! Plus, did you hear they won’t even go to lacrosse games until Georgetown gets a stock car racing team?”
Moose Williams (COL ’08), a freshman here at Georgetown, explains why he is happy to find this new group: “I followed some of my New South hallmates to a Hoya Blue party, and I was very disappointed. All they had was Natty Ice or some crap and lousy rap music. I want to party like I did before I came to school—with moonshine, Lynyrd Skynyrd, NASCAR on TV, and some roadkill on the grill.” When asked how they would fund these activities, one member proposed a tobacco farm; another suggested a used tractor and truck lot. Corky Lee leaned back in his front porch rocking chair and said, “Well, whatever we do, at least we don’t have to be in that group where everyone’s from New Jersey or Boston.”