Despite weeks of protesting, students at Gallaudet University, the nation’s most well known deaf university, say the administration has yet to listen. Students have been protesting since the announcement of the new president, Jane K. Fernandes, who is only partially deaf, and whom students feel is not in touch with their needs. Students have been... »
WASHINGTON—Still reeling from revelations of sexual misconduct by Rep. Mark Foley (R-Florida), House Speaker Dennis Hastert today warned that House Republicans “must get on the same page as quickly as possible.” “Ever since this scandal broke, it seems like everyone around here has been on a different page,” Hastert (R-Illinois) said at a press conference... »
Georgetown University President John J. DeGioia, a previously unknown species of Pokémon, evolved into a Squirtle in his Healy Hall office Wednesday afternoon. Billy McCullough (MSB ’10), a self-described “professional Pokémon trainer,” entered the Office of the President Wednesday and touched DeGioia with a Water Stone, according to DPS officers on the scene. The president... »
On Wednesday, the Vatican reversed decades of official doctrine, and, in a surprise move, approved the use of condoms as “divinely inspired” according to a Vatican spokesman. The announcement came after an unusual homily the Pope delivered at Mass in St. Paul’s Cathedral on Sunday. According to Cardinal Ian McGodfrey, the Pope spent several minutes... »
Just weeks after the Food and Drug Administration lifted its warnings on fresh spinach grown in California’s Salinas Valley, a popular brand of human feces made there has been recalled from grocery stores over concerns about E. coli contamination. The feces may have caused illnesses already in 3 states, but no deaths have been yet... »
Timmy is waiting with nothing to do Maybe, he thinks, I’ll go take a poo But then comes a knock on Timmy’s front door Thank goodness for anything to ease up the bore He opens the door and finds his friend Jimmy Hey Jimmy, says Timmy, who lets him on in Jimmy just smiles and shows him a tin The tin... »
A group of animal psychologists in Sweden today released the results of a study revealing that if woodchucks could in fact chuck wood, they would not really make an effort sufficient to chuck all the wood they really could. The woodchucks, the scientists claim, would in fact chuck only about half of their daily... »
