HARBIN FIELD — Calling it “the first step in the journey toward manhood,” the Georgetown University football team anxiously anticipated its first victory against Brown University as the final seconds ticked away.

“I’m really proud of these guys. It’s a special day for all of them,” said Head Coach Ron Sglarta. “They finally found a game they could settle down with and commit to.”

Georgetown football team members debrief with friends and family to discuss their first victory.

Sglarta added he was “immensely pleased” with his player’s decision to wear padded protection for their first victory.

“If you’re not smart and safe out there, that stuff can really mess you up,” said Sglarta. “I don’t care what another team says about how few other teams they’ve played: you can never be too careful.”

While the athletic officials were quite pleased with results, members of the team appeared tense about their first victory.

“I thought we were just fooling around on the field – I had no idea it would get this serious,” said Linebacker A.J. Houshani (COL ’15) his hands drenched in sweat. “This is a huge step in our lives.”

“Is this supposed to feel good?” said Houshani. “Do you feel good right now?”

Houshani was not alone in expressing this anxious sentiment. Several other teammates spoke at a press conference addressing their concerns with the first victory.

“I just kept thinking ‘what am I supposed to do with my hands?’ during the victory,” said Cornerback Fletcher McKinley (COL ’16). “Should I be talking dirty during the victory? Would they like that? Would it be awkward if they were just playing with our ball and I didn’t say anything?”

McKinley continued on to imagine several other hypothetical situations in which the victory was not enjoyable for either team.

“At this point it’s just a relief,” said Running Back Erik Campbell (MSB ’15). “We just seemed so inexperienced. All these other cool teams had their first victory so long ago. It’s a real monkey off our back.”