LEAVEY– If any of you are looking for a great place to park $1.25 after an insane night of partying, look no further.

These vending machines artfully placed in Hoya Court of the Leavey Center provide instant alleviation from those drunken cravings that can only be satisfied by sugar, fat and anything “edible.”

After popping into a pregame in Village B and a rager in Henle, I will admit the Leavey vending machines were not my first choice. But Eat & Joy was much, much too far. Perfect Pita might as well have been on the moon. But on the intense urging of my friends of the vending machines as “there” it became my dining option for the night.

While this critic should have, in retrospect, taken more note of the lack of aesthetics in Hoya Court, the lack of judgment from a Vittles’ cashier or Epi manager was strikingly comforting.

Did you know: the vending machines operate all 365 days a year? Wow!

I may not have intended to hit B2 and buy a Kit Kat bar, the machine obviously knew what was best for me.

To drunkenly marvel at the machine fetch my Kit Kat bar with its precision guided claws is a treat in itself.

The variety of foods sold by these vending machines can only be described as eclectic, inviting, and deviously decadent.  From only the greasiest bags of lays to That Quasi-Melted Almond Joy That Might Be Nearing Its Expiration Date, these vending machines have it all.

The “do-it-yourself” feel to the machines gives you a hands-on approach to dining that you just don’t get at 3 am from Five Guys or Eat & Joy.

At the end of the day, the Leavey Vending Machines provide that last-ditch, but underrated option when you’re out of flex dollars at Epi and too drunk to maneuver around all that goddamn construction.

When asked if they would recommend the Leavey Vending Machines to a friend, 65% of Georgetown students said they would do so “almost sometimes.”

DRUNK FOOD CRITIC RATING: Ya.