HEALY HALL – Awed by his stunning ability to take the stage at a moments notice, GU Fossil Free announced on Tuesday that they would be bringing their hero Kanye West to speak on April 28th.  “Kanye has perfected the art of disregarding who is on the stage and why people are listening to who is on stage. Earning attention takes too long when you can just take it from someone else,” said GU Fossil Free President Carla Kasminsky (COL ’16) while standing in front of the group’s banner from their stage debut in the middle of Dr. Jim Yong Kim’s speech. “We’re just amateurs by comparison. We started in Gaston, but hopefully with ‘Ye’s counsel, we can start rushing bigger and bigger stages.” West’s agent says that the speaking engagement will be done pro bono to demonstrate his commitment to engaging college students in the important dialogue of “distraction activism.”