NEW SOUTH — Less than three weeks after the opening of the Healey Family Student Center, sectarian strife among students has gripped much of the area surrounding Library Walk and Prospect Street over rights to nickname the new facility.

Absent from architect’s plans for the Healey Family Student Center was a centralized nickname.

Following failure from central administration figures to bestow a catchy nickname to the student center, for three weeks different and bitterly opposed groups have arisen to fill the so-called “moniker void.”

“At the root of this conflict you are seeing students fighting a desperate struggle to have ultimate bragging rights,” said analyst Damien Rhert who has been following the conflict closely since the ribbon cutting ceremony. “Whichever side prevails will soon be able to yell ‘I started that!’ forever in the face of anyone who uses its name. That’s power right there.”

Two popular fronts have emerged in the vacuum left by the clumsy, unwieldy and long name chosen by the administration for the student center. Both leaders of “the Heal” and “HFSC” claim to be the original alternative though the facts remain shrouded in mystery.

While both groups claim inroads within the Georgetown community, setbacks have prevented both groups from declaring total victory.

Detractors have claimed that “the Heal” remains too close to “Healy” and the “HFSC” faction suffered internal division with the departure of breakaway group “HSC.”

Underground group “Heal Fam Stu Cen” has gained traction among the ironic population of Georgetown but appears to be doomed in the long run once the shock value of the name wears off.

With such a divisive and passionate backing on all fronts, neither side seems ready to deescalate tensions.

At press time, each faction agreed that the name “Bulldog Tavern” for the new on-campus pub “really sucked.”