HARBIN — A pair of visiting parents arriving for the weekend were reportedly “livid” at the quality of alcohol in their son’s dorm room.

Joseph Antonelli (COL ‘18), a resident of Harbin 4, was shocked when he showed his parents his dorm room, but said he “probably deserved it.”

Joseph’s father said he has to spend at least $60 every trip to Dixie.

“The first thing my dad did was go for the fridge,” he told the Heckler. “He threw the door open and immediately started yelling about the amount of Natural Light that I had. He was demanding to know why there wasn’t more fancy stuff.”

According to witnesses, Joseph’s father berated his son for not investing more money in his dorm’s alcohol supply.

“Do you think this is a joke? Do you think I pay $60,000 a year for you to drink this crap?”

Joseph’s mother, Samantha, was not much happier.

When Joseph told her that he was planning on staying in that night to study for midterms, Samantha called him “basic,” before leaving for a Village A party.

An extremely hungover Samantha told the Heckler the next day that she just wants her son to represent the family name well. “Enough with this studying stuff. He’s going to be unemployed classics major when he graduates anyway.”

Joseph’s father was last seen at Dixie, buying four bottles of Guiness and a handle of Dos Equis so he would “stop embarrassing the family.”