LEO’S — Following a concerted administrative effort to crack down on Georgetown’s underground meal swipe trade, the GUPD busted a massive meal swipe ring operating out of Lau 2 last Wednesday.
Following a six-month investigation, GUPD arrested of alleged ringleader Todd McCarthy (MSB ‘15), GUPD announced its intention to . His lawyer told the Heckler that “My client’s a businessman. You can’t blame him for seeing an opportunity and taking it.”
McCarthy (MSB ’15) could face academic probation.
Several underclassmen have recently come to the Heckler, on the condition of anonymity, to describe McCarthy’s process. One described it as “incredibly addictive. Leo’s food is just so good, and I was only on the 14-per-week plan, and I got desperate. Once I got started, I couldn’t stop.” Another explained that McCarthy would “wait on Lau 5 at a table in a corner and we’d go over and give him our money. He’d give us a paper bag with the swipes in it, and sometimes he’d even include some chicken fingers as payment up front.”
When asked for his thoughts, President John DeGoia praised GUPD’s responsiveness. “Wow. Just wow,” he said, when the Heckler questioned how he felt about the GUPD’s actions. “How many other colleges have a police force that devotes themselves to ensuring that no one can cheat the meal plan system?” DeGoia had to pause for a moment as tears welled up in his eyes. “I just want to know that my meal swipes are safe,” he continued. “And now I do.”
The Leo’s staff has also expressed gratitude for these developments. One cook described McCarthy as a “consistent nuisance. We had to start throwing hamburger patties at him when he tried to steal the meal swipes. It was awful. Thank God for the GUPD.”
McCarthy’s lawyer is also being investigated by the administration for being a recipient of the meal swipes and sneaking into Leo’s when no one was looking. “It was the soft-serve,” he reportedly told friends. “I just couldn’t stay away.”
Rumours are circulating that Leo’s will now have the motto “Justice is Served…with Wok” above its doors.
