LEO’S – Several confidential sources for the Heckler have reported that a “full-blown nut job” is currently attending Georgetown.

This file photo, courtesy of the Office of Student Conduct, is designed to illustrate the sane way of preparing cereal.

The student whose sanity is in question, Anthony Brady (SFS ’17), raised several red flags after he was seen pouring his milk in the bowl before his cereal this Friday morning.

Brady, who by all accounts before this morning was a “pretty nice guy,” now, according to many of his acquaintances, “scares the living bejesus” out of anyone he encounters.

“I have been friends with Anthony since first semester of freshman year. It’s strange how little you can know someone you interact with so much,” said sophomore Megan Dimos.

“There’s just no way he can know if he got the proportions right,” she added.

Jay Gruber, Chief of the Georgetown University Police Department, told the Heckler “we have received many concerns from people who know Mr. Brady, and we’ll certainly keep an eye on him. Unfortunately, there is not much we can do now at this point, given the fact that his method for making a bowl of cereal does not technically count as ‘physical endangerment of others.’”