Huh, that’s weird. I just got the results back from the Georgetown Marriage Pact and it says I’m 100% compatible with… let me make sure I’m pronouncing this correctly… your mom? What are the chances! I don’t know Mrs. Brennan very well but it looks like we’d be perfect together. Let’s see… what did I say I was looking for in a person… oh, here it is:

–      I said I wanted someone so dumb, they get hit by parked cars.

–       I said I wanted someone so old that their social security number is one.

–       I said my ideal partner would also be someone so fat that it takes me two buses and a train to get to their good side.

Gee, this Marriage Pact thing really works! Who knew we’d be such a perfect fit! Do you think you could introduce me when she finishes taking two hours to watch an episode of 60 Minutes?