After final grades were submitted, we asked professors to send us the papers that made them shake their heads and contemplate why they spend so much time and money on getting a PhD. These are some of our top picks:

ECON 341: Nunya’s Law and Why It’s None of Your Business

The Male Gays: How All Late Twentieth-Century Films Were Made By And For Homosexual Men in Hollywood

BIO 232: Why The Mitochondria Might Not Be the Powerhouse of the Cell

Esto Es Mi Papel Final Para Español Intermedio Dos

PHIL 045: Occam’s Razor And Why I Prefer Not To Explain Myself

From Carthage to Cannibalism, A Biography of Hannibal

GOVT 201: How One Episode of “Potomac Watch” Is Now My Entire Opinion On the Inflation and Now I Will Repeat Everything Paul Gigot Said

“Taste the Fruit, And Resign Yourself To The Earth” And Other Lines That Make Me Think Henry David Thoreau Was Bisexual

On Why Herodotus Was The Absolute Daddy of History

MARK 078: I’m a Leo, Shouldn’t That Be Enough?