Bats abound, pumpkins aplenty – It’s that time of the year again. That’s right, it is the annual “Sacrifice a Freshman” time from our very own Copley Crypt Cult. One of the many Georgetown traditions celebrated on campus, the Copley Crypt Cult typically picks three freshmen to sacrifice in the month of October in honor of the Rat King Valhar.

The proclamations start spewing in the beginning of the month, ranging from descriptions of the person, to oddly specific details of the times they embarrassed themselves in public. They typically end with the candidates being called ‘stinky little poop heads’ before they are taken to the crypt.

This year, however, things have changed. Head cultist Vogoh was quoted as saying: “We need to keep things fresh. Keep things spicy. We’ll take ’em by surprise!” Personally, we at the Heckler can’t wait to see what crops up out of their new approach. On special request, cultist John Hellhola (Head of Communications, Copley Crypt Cult) wishes to send his best regards: “Stay stinky, my little shits!”

Candidates are typically detail oriented, deadline motivated, perfectly sane, planners of both short and long term, and well adjusted. Keep an eye out Freshmen! It could be anyone – what a delight!