Ed Nonymous
Writer
President’s Office Denies Vine of DeGioia Falling off Hoverboard Motivated Device’s Ban
By Ed Nonymous | January 9, 2016
HEALY HALL — The president’s office issued a formal denial on Saturday in response to growing suspicion within the Georgetown community that a January 7th email from Chris Augostini banning hoverboards was motivated by a recently-posted Vine of University President John DeGioia “eating shit” after trying to step on to a hoverboard. “In the spirit […]
Senior Disorientation Leaves Class of 2016 Blindfolded in Slums of Lahore, Pakistan
By Ed Nonymous | October 3, 2015
“This was, by far, the most disorienting dis-o I’ve ever heard of and I’m lucky to be a part of it,” – Helen Teningham (SFS ’16).
NSO’s “Hoya SurrealTalk” Offers Freshmen a Dialogue About Implications of Surrealism on Life In College
By Ed Nonymous | August 31, 2015
GASTON HALL — In an attempt to showcase to first year students the ways in which the early 20th century artistic movement pervades almost every aspect of the undergraduate experience, New Student Orientation’s “Hoya SurrealTalk” staged a 45-minute long exhibition followed by a small group discussion. “I always knew surrealism was going to be a […]
MC Escher to Receive Lifetime Achievement Award for ICC Design
By Ed Nonymous | June 21, 2015
ICC — Georgetown University’s Office of Public Affairs announced earlier today that Intercultural Center architect MC Escher is set to receive a lifetime achievement award for his central role in planning the landmark building. Vice President of Public Affairs Derrick Tollhouse wrote in a campus-wide e-mail today that “Escher’s crucial input in crafting this perception-warping […]
Surgeon General Recommends Classifying Watching Georgetown Basketball as a “High Risk Behavior”
By Ed Nonymous | January 24, 2015
WHITE HOUSE — Late Saturday afternoon Surgeon General Vivek Murthy released the results of a 7 year study in which he recommended that watching Georgetown basketball be classified as a “high risk behavior.” “Whether struggling to maintain a lead in the closing minutes of a game or attempting a futile comeback, even a single […]
Citing “Distractions” in Classroom, Professor Bans Students from Seminar
By Ed Nonymous | January 21, 2015
ICC 108— Calling the human mind “a well-intentioned device which is perpetually misused,” Government Professor Dave Santos informed his Women in Politics seminar today he was no longer allowing laptops to be used by students during class. “When the human mind was introduced I was at first optimistic that it could be used for scholarly […]