There really is no place like DC in the springtime. The cherry blossoms come out and tourists flock into enjoy them. It’s a whole mess of congestion—both of sinuses and roads. What could be more delightful? After six months on tour with ISIS, I was really looking forward to spending some time in DC. I […]

Dear Dahlgren Chapel Vandals, I would like to preface this letter by saying that I rarely feel moved to speak out on the twaddle I read in The Hoya.  Between leading the unsuspecting off the path of righteousness, tormenting the souls of the damned, and shooting skeet with Wayne LaPierre, I am a terribly busy […]