via The Hoya

ICC—The Planning Committee for the 90th Annual Diplomatic Ball announced yesterday that because of budget cuts, the Diplomatic Ball will take place in a first-floor ICC bathroom. “We’re doing our best to save money by holding the event on campus this year,” said spokesperson Jenna Coleman (MSB ’15). “We feel that the easy access to the toilet and automatic paper towel dispensers will really impress any dignitaries that attend.”

Hoyas have gotten behind the idea with enthusiasm.

“I’m ridiculously excited,” said Peter Davison (SFS ’18) while buying his ticket for the event. “I’ve always sat on the toilet in there before my 9 AM French class thinking to myself, ‘Wouldn’t this 5 square foot space make a great dance floor?’ And that sign that says, ‘Please wash your hands,’? Tell me that’s not Georgetown prestige.”

The change in location is expected to draw in even bigger D.C. names.

Former president and alumnus Bill Clinton released a statement saying that he would attend the ball, but only on the condition that the Stall Seat Journal is finally updated. “This thing’s from when I went here!” he yelled at reporters while using the bathroom.

At press time, the planning committee was reportedly considering expanding the location to include the janitor’s closet next door.