While every God-fearing student of Georgetown mourns the results of the recent GUSA election, one widely regarded as having been tampered with, one pair of students is in high spirits, despite these dark times. Sahil Nair (‘19) and Naba Rahman (‘19) spent the wee hours of this morning counting their reward for betraying the Son of God.

When asked about his actions, Sahil said “While the Lord was most certainly the best candidate for GUSA president, I was able to bring to my own strengths to the race, namely soaring avarice and a willingness to subvert the will of the Almighty.”

His rival candidates were able to identify a turning point when the race started to shift away from our Savior and towards the Sahil and Naba campaign. Casey Doherty (‘20), a candidate for VP, said “I think it was the moment during the presidential debate when he announced that he was completely for sale to the highest bidder and cared little about betraying his morals and his God that things really started to go his way.”

At press time we rest in the hands of Our Lord, may our faith see us through these dark times.