Healy Lawn was awash with confusion Wednesday morning after President John DeGioia climbed atop John Carroll with a shoddily-fashioned paraglider mounted on his back, screamed, “Later, bitch nerds!” and leaped from the lap of the statue, quickly hitting the ground due to a complete lack of buoyancy and spraining a clavicle. In an interview with […]

Hark! Hark! Hear my tale of sights heretofore unseen. It was only this very morning while strolling along the bricklaid esplanàde when, would you know, upon looking up from the Facebook, I caught sight of small furry friend of man. The twinkle in its eye lit a similar glint in my own, and on I […]

Hoyas, it’s that time of the year again! New Student Orientation is here and so are all the fun-filled traditions that come with it, including one of the university’s most widely celebrated: The Implantation! Today, each member of the incoming freshman class will line up to receive one microchip in the neck, promptly passing out […]