The Georgetown Heckler

News | April 1, 2016

Mitch Hedberg Celebrates 11 Years Sober

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New York, NY – Standup comedian Mitch Hedberg, renowned for his punchy one-liners and unconventional style, reached a huge milestone Tuesday, celebrating his eleventh year in a row as substance-free.

 

“We’re incredibly proud of Mitch for all his hard work” his wife Lynn Shawcroft told the press. “It isn’t easy battling addiction for as long as he has. I don’t know what his strategy is, but it seems to be working like magic.”

 

The 48 year old comedian stopped using drugs cold-turkey on March 29th 2005, which was heralded as a sudden and unprecedented turnaround.

 

“It was crazy. It was like one day he was a drop away from overdosing and the next he was completely clean and has never even thought about going back,” said Shawcroft, saying that his success story is what caused her to get clean herself.

 

The medical community offered a curt admonishment.

 

“From a medical standpoint, what Mr. Hedberg did was extremely damaging to his health,” reported addiction specialist Bernard Goolby. “He risked hallucinations, anxiety, and even death.”

 

Not all have been pleased with Hedberg’s straight path.

 

“I’ve noticed that ever since he stopped using drugs, Mitch hasn’t done a single show” complained longtime fan Teddy Huxton. “I don’t know if they’re related but it seems to me like if he relapsed, even just once, we could get some more great comedy out of it.”

 

Plans for the momentous occasion are expected to be small with many anticipating that the former heroin addict won’t even acknowledge its passing in an attempt to keep it behind him.

 

Hedberg himself could not be reached for comment.

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