Ah, yes, the classic coming-of-age struggle of ridding oneself of all earthly desires in the name of total enlightenment while also trying to bust every now and then. We at the Heckler know the difficulty of balancing one’s Buddhist intentions while looking like an absolute 10/10, so we have compiled a short listicle of 5 ways you can get closer to breaking free of Samsara, the continuous cycle of death and rebirth in which us feeble human beings are trapped by karma and ignorance.

1. Arch your back when in lotus position so the person behind you sees your pink little thong peeking out from the top of your patchwork harem pants. 
2. Find a Vipassana meditation treat for your opposite gender and go. Make sure it’s silent. That way, no one can ask what you’re doing there, but can spend hours tracing the curves of your body as you sit side by side all day long. As you aim towards achieving a non-self state of being, freeing your conscious from within itself, you can imagine others inside you instead.
3. While transitioning through the Thirty-One Planes of Existence, you will experience the truest natures of reality to the fullest degree that you are spiritually capable. Make sure to maintain good posture—shoulders straight, lower back curved!—and make assertive eye contact with the celestial entities tormenting you for the innumerable errors you made in your past life. Fellow inhabitants of the human plane, Manussa, might be turned on by this. 
4. Practice shifting your pickup line approaches, instead trying things like “Hey, there are no more yoga mats 🙁 You can sit on my lap instead!”; “Babe, let’s escape from the duhka and instead let me fuhk u-a ;)”; “You must be a bodhisattva the way that body is sat all up on that ass.” That way, you can signal to your potential partner that not only are you interested in fornication, but taking a step toward nirvana together. 
5. Sutras are quotations from Buddhist lore that have aphoristic and, at times, paradoxical meanings. The study of sutras is traditionally intended to decipher a truth, but it can serve other ends. For instance, you can approach your crush and ask them how baaaad their karma was in past lives while winking, and then follow up by inquiring how they still manage to look so godamn good. While they struggle to provide an answer, offer a comprehensive analysis of how good things happen to bad people as they come back to your room.