On the February 13th episode of the New York Times’ ‘The Daily,’ host Michael Barbaro made a surprising vow to listeners. “I, Michael Barbaro, of the New York Times’ ‘The Daily’ podcast, featuring myself, Michael Barbaro, am done with liars. This podcast reaches two million people daily, yet it seems everyone has something to say […]

English has been spoken for many hundreds of years on many continents (8 if you include the Moon)! Think of all the people that have said things: Shakespeare, Rosa Parks, Malala… The list can go on for a long time! How can you match them? You can’t. The English language is overused, cliché, and impossible […]

ZOOM—Imagine a silent Zoom call with twenty Republicans singing a song about widespread voter fraud to the tune of Happy Xmas (War is Over) by John Lennon and Yoko Ono. That’s about all you need to know about this week’s Georgetown University College Republicans (GUCR) Choir performance.  Whether the audience enjoyed the performance is unknown. […]

We at the Heckler know your situation. The Fountain Pen Boy from your discussion section, unannounced, introduces himself to you and applauds you on a great question last class. Before you know it, he explains the answer TA Josh gave you with a myriad of false and unnecessary details. We know what you’re thinking: What […]

After Sarah Killem posted a poll with 14 responses on the Free Food on Campus Groupme, she knew exactly what Hoyas needed from her GUSA campaign.  “The results are loud and clear: 98% of Hoyas would support the death penalty for classmates who wear suits to Zoom class,” Killem, hopeful tsar of the new GUSA […]

HELL — After 5 years of kicking it back Bulldog style in Doggy Heaven, Jack the Bulldog’s (b.2003, d.2015) afterlife was changed forever. Father Sleck, S.J, who has dedicated the past 3 years of his career to examining and overturning cold dog files, came upon Jack’s case this past week.  “A brave student tipped me […]

PORTLAND—Jeanette Applebaum stands proudly in her open-concept, minimalist kitchen. Seven years ago, she underwent a controversial procedure to edit her son’s genome.  “Genetically editing the embryo of my beautiful baby boy was the best decision I’ve made in my life….And I’m paleo!” Applebaum flew to China to take advantage of the two weeks Dr. Jiankui […]