Some people are just immediately unlikable. I find this to be especially true of elitists. It’s so sad when people feel the need to justify their intelligence or prove how special they are in gaudy performative shows. If you’re self-assured and truly smart, there is no need to flex!  Every time I log into my […]

English has been spoken for many hundreds of years on many continents (8 if you include the Moon)! Think of all the people that have said things: Shakespeare, Rosa Parks, Malala… The list can go on for a long time! How can you match them? You can’t. The English language is overused, cliché, and impossible […]

ZOOM—Imagine a silent Zoom call with twenty Republicans singing a song about widespread voter fraud to the tune of Happy Xmas (War is Over) by John Lennon and Yoko Ono. That’s about all you need to know about this week’s Georgetown University College Republicans (GUCR) Choir performance.  Whether the audience enjoyed the performance is unknown. […]

It’s long past time that women should be allowed to play chess. This new statement of activism became apparent to me after watching Netflix’s brilliant limited series The Queen’s Gambit. Before this show, I did not know women. Period. But, once I learned about women, I also learned that they were not allowed to play […]

WILMINGTON, Del.–Much excitement has surrounded the shape of the Biden Administration’s future cabinet, especially considering the foreshadowed appointments of an all-female communications team, with groundbreaking numbers of people of color. Entering the White House to serve a nation plump with national crises has demanded of the new administration a tighter and more well-rounded executive, fit […]

CAIRO – On Thursday, a team of archaeologists uncovered what is likely the largest archaeological discovery of 2020 in the necropolis of Saqqara. In the televised press conference later that day, lead archaeologist Dr. Ned Finkenbiner announced his elevated heart rate and the discovery of 100 painted coffins in Saqqara, funerary masks, and canopic jars. […]

WASHINGTON – It just came in the mail, delivered by MY boys in blue, the good men and women of the United States Postal Service. My fingers fumbled with the packing tape, but after several broken nails, a severe cardboard cut, and a routine bloody nose, there it was. My very own Biden-Harris 2020 mask. […]

We at the Heckler know your situation. The Fountain Pen Boy from your discussion section, unannounced, introduces himself to you and applauds you on a great question last class. Before you know it, he explains the answer TA Josh gave you with a myriad of false and unnecessary details. We know what you’re thinking: What […]

Thanksgiving is upon us and it is time to baste the turkey. All eyes are on you. We all remember what happened last year. Use this guide to avoid the allure of sexualizing the bird and deliver a perfectly platonically basted Turkey to your family’s dining room table! Step 1: Get the gobbler ready for […]