Huh, that’s weird. I just got the results back from the Georgetown Marriage Pact and it says I’m 100% compatible with… let me make sure I’m pronouncing this correctly… your mom? What are the chances! I don’t know Mrs. Brennan very well but it looks like we’d be perfect together. Let’s see… what did I […]

The COVID-19 pandemic has taken a heavy toll on the country’s artistic community. Shuttered venues and taped-off galleries have deprived artists and consumers alike of the joys of intimate, in-person artistic experiences.  Last week, the pandemic claimed its latest victim in the artistic world, forcing the cancellation of a long-awaited Georgetown University exhibition showcasing Lauinger […]

WASHINGTON, D.C.–After a long summer reckoning with racism and the most recent realization that Asian Americans are also people of color, white activists are once again calling themselves to action (because no one really asked them in the first place) to fight against systems they perpetuate daily.  Instagram Progressives and TikTok Leftists are reigniting their […]

A buzzer sounds. Sweat drips from a nose— a nose lower to the ground than all other noses on the court. Max Squatts, with his 5’6” frame, gave it all he had, but it just wasn’t enough. The Buzzer Beatniks, the clear underdogs of the Georgetown Intramural Basketball scene, have lost again— for the seventh […]

“Hej! Hjälp mig!”  I call out to the infinite streams of smiling customers constantly, but they are too awestruck and overstimulated by the impeccable environment of Scandinavian design and innovation to notice my predicament. A LOMMARP here, a KALKGRUND there–a blue glass SVARTSJÖN catches the eye and they’re off to the next fun-filled showroom.  Believe […]

I was told it would be a “little pinch.” It was NOT a “little pinch.” My arm is basically numb and my shoulder is way too tender to do my nightly stretches. Just a second ago I tried to raise my hand in class but I couldn’t even do that! It was in zoom class […]

It happens to everyone. But not as badly as it happened to Andy Lewis (COL ‘21) the other day in the ICC Galleria.  “Our TA literally looks like some kind of morphed Jake Gyllenhall,” his friend Julia joked, gesturing towards Andy as if to ask for his confirmation. Ha. He kind of does, thought Andy, […]

“Friends, family, vulturous representatives of SAC, we gather here today to remember and celebrate the life of our dear friend, arch-nemesis, and lover, the Georgetown Caravel. Today is, to be sure, a sad day. But it is also a day for rejoicing, for we know that our favorite undergraduate organization that rephrased Reuters articles and […]